snotglass speaks

Wednesday, June 11, 2003

Help is on the Way

In a bold effort to correct eight years of liberal mismanagement of the US Army under the failed Clinton administration, our popularly elected wartime President’s defense secretary has selected a competent replacement for defeatist liberal and Clinton political appointee General Eric Shinseki.

After an exhaustive search for a competent replacement, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, chief architect of President George W. Bush’s decisive victory in the Battle of Iraq, has selected retired General Peter Shoomaker to bring the Army into the 21st Century. Recent analysis by the Joshua Milton Blahyi Special Warfare Center at the American Enterprise Institute has shown that the Army relies too much on outdated tactics, equipment and personnel policies. Unless radical changes are made quickly, the Army will be unable to meet the security challenges posed by the threat of terrorism.

Independent research by noted author and professor of military science Jonah Goldberg has corroborated these findings. His research has discovered that the Army is mainly prepared to fight conventional conflicts involving tanks, artillery and infantry. “The Army is shockingly unprepared to meet future conflict. Shinseki’s recent statement that ‘hundreds of thousands’ of American troops might be ties down in Iraq for many years just shows that his thinking and training are out of step with the President’s bold vision for the future.”

The President needs generals who share his strategic ideals.